Divers in underland

It pleases the Outer Limits section of the Society to present a glimpse of the exotique. Without further words, let the visual - and aural - delights exclaim for themselves: Such peace! Such pace! Such majesty! Such curious wiggly things! Indeed, the very essence of exploration and enlightenment!

Summer in the City

Or, cities, to be more precise. This Summer's push-bike touring took me through several very pleasant Finnish "summer cities", here in a handy Video-graphy for your viewing pleasure (now with sound!!)

Ta ta!
P-wick

It is B52 time!!

Me and me whiskers in San Marino's "1st tower"

For over a decade now, Wensworth and I have had a traditional sundowner when aboard: the B52. Especially when we visit a country or capital therebefore unknown to us, we shall try to order a B52. So as I was stomping up the hills and alleys of San Marino, I thought to myself, "Whut-ho, this is exactly the kind of spot to enjoy one of our traditional Foreign Capital B52s!"

So I went to a nice bar on one of the alleys, and asked for the drink. Unfortunately the bar-tender knew not of what I was on about. So I explained the ingredients, and he happily set about to mix me the concoction.
Again, unfortunately, I failed to tell him the method of mixology, so he proceeded to pour the ingredients over ice, and shake vigorously. Here, then, is my first ever shaken, not stirred, B52 with bits of ice! A nice enough drink, as it happens, but not a proper B52. Oh well, what we must suffer for science and exploration!

Shaken, not stirred!

So later I found meself in Monaco, or Monte Carlo as the italiand call it (Monaco, apparently, could mean München, which was not where I wanted to go...). After making a killing at the Casino, it was once again time for a sundowner.

By this time me moustache was desperately trying to make an escape...
(perhaps it wanted back to the Casino, in the background?)

Unfortunately the first couple of bars had trouble understanding such magickal mystical ingredients as "Kahlua", but the third time was the charm. Curiously the fellow "built" the famously layered drink into a rather narrow whisky sniffer. Also, he acted hastily, causing the Baileys and Cointreau to mix, which caused a somewhat unappetizing chemical reaction:

Monte Carlo style!

When back in Rome, it was time to do as the Romans do. Actually our little tradition dates back to a certain bar in Rome, back in the previous decade/century/millenium, so as a curious lark I decided to see if the good olde watering hole was still in business. Alas, it is! The Big Hilda bar/cafe still operates in Trastevere! They had done away with the fat Hippopotamus in their logo, but otherwise it is much the same bar. They even have the B52 right on their drink list. As I chatted with the barmaid about (lack of) hippos and what-not, she expertly built the drink into a cocktail glass and lit the Cointreau on fire! Ah, brings back memories of ye goode old tymes!

This is how it is done, with a straw and Cointreaou on fire!

A big Thank You to the Big Hilda for a good drink!
That is all for now. Until next time, drink responsibly!

Ta ta
Paddlewick

Tour de Naesijaervi

Last weekend 'twas time again for the annual Tour de Naesijarvi out there in and around the "Manchester of Finland". Our team, known originally two years ago as "Team HOT BAT" due to the initials of the participants, had this time around diminished into the rather less impressive "Team BH", as Messiers Squirrels, Hopewell, Mynxter et al had caught the flu, important business matters, or laziness.

My morning got to a less than stellar start, as I managed to over-sleep, and found myself with a quite paltry 20 minutes to get to the train. I did make it with minutes to spare (!), but had to skip the morning tea in progress. And as you all know, breakfast is an important part of a day like this!

Nevertheless, Hopewell's cousin Mr. Hulqoe and I arrived in "Manchester" with ample time for our final preparations, and off we went! 134 km of road ahead of us, sunny weather, yet the temperature was slightly below 10C, forcing us to wear long shirts or jackets, and gloves - this in the middle of June, for heaven's sake! I expected more from the organizers!

Below are some pictures from along the route:

The starting grid around 9:42 AM

I swear the Photography Apparatus has a mind of its
own: this here is its impression of the Tower of the Naesi-Needle


Past the half-way mark, the Locks of Murolee. This is just
after a long and fun downhill and before some hard climbs,
so everybody just shoots by. This time I wanted to stop and
smell the proverbial roses.

Liquid balance is most important in outings like this

Mr. Hulqoe somewhere out there

Typical bucolic landscape of the Manchester region

Let's hope the whole Team Hot Bat will be able to ride next year! Meanwhile, keep on pedalling!

Paddlewick, esq.

True Explorers

This week I am honoured to introduce two real-life explorers of the push-bike kind: Mr. Pete and Ms. Daniela. Recently I was doing research into a possible jaunt up to Nordkapp, I came accross Mr. Pete's blogge. And as I was reading it, it dawned to me that he was actually cycling in Finland at the moment! So I dispatched an Elektronik Message to him, inviting them to stop by if/when they reached Helsinki. My motives were not totally altruistic, of course, since I figured I could get some first-hand information about push-biking in the Finnmark...
They did reach Helsinki eventually, and I showed them around town a bit. They then sailed south to Estonia to continue their south-ward expedition.
I tip my (top)hat to them and heartily wish them the best of luck, and many puncture-free miles!!

Paddlewick, Esq, Society Hospitality Coordinator

Sunny day to Bårgeaux

This past Sunday was a perfectly mild & sunny day for a leisurely pedal to the historic Bårgeaux, about 50km east of Helsinki, along the coast. The trip was organized by "push-bike couriers", so the mode of transportation was mostly of the fixed-gear type. We had a nice piquenique in the town, climbed to the recently renovated Church, and the took the old King's Highway back.



Quite exhausting in the end, especially considering my previous record on a fixie was only 70km :)
I'm looking forward to next cycle trips, possibly Lapland this summer?! Perhaps I'll see some of you on the trails and highways!

Ta ta
Paddlewick, Society Fixed Gear Supervisor

PS. A Goldfrapp version of the Musick Video lies here.

Park life

Here, may I present You another push-biking videography. But despair not, for this one is somewhat different from the last one: this was "shot" with the apparatus attached to my top-hat, thus resulting in a first-person perspective (or POV as the professionals call it).

Without further ado, enjoy (and join us next time)!

Push-biking in the Snow

Jeeves tells me one can add Video-graphy to the News-letters these days. Will the Wonders ever cease, I say! So let us try our hands at this new Moving Picture phenomenon:
If it works properly, You should be able to observe Mr. Squirrelton and Yours Truly engaging in some fun deep-snow exploration in the distant forests of Middle- and Upper Helsinki, accompanied by some classical music.
Last week was even more fun, because the snow was dryer & harder; unfortunately the creeping Spring-time softens the snow, and makes for more labourous pedalling.

Ta ta!
Paddlewick, Society Winter Bicycle Excursion Coordinator

L&GotS,

Keep in mind, in your daily dalliances and revelationary peregrinations, the wise words of this this gentleman.

Wensworth pointing at a pinnacle

Paddlewick peering into the blinding fog

In the meanwhile, it pleases Yours Truly to announce the success of several small scale sojourns to observe Small Local Flora & Fauna; and to observe Mr. Paddlewick & co, via The Orient Realm Of Japonia and the Northern Realms of Canadia. Much Brisk & Healthy snow activity was enjoyed.

Captain Jack carefully proof-reading the
instructions for the Tube before enbarking
on the wild ride down the hill

Lady S & Cap'n Jack after the harrowing ride

A bald eagle on Bainbridge Island, with Seattle as backdrop

Lounging at Bainbridge

Hearty Thank-Yous to all friends and family who helped make the trip enjoyable!
Until we meet again, god bless & godspeed!

Paddlewick, esq.
Wensworth, esq.

The Chap-athlon MMVIII

The International Chap-athlon were held in early December, allowing all able-bodied and like-minded Chaps to gather together in the spirit of Athletics and Spirits. Both were in good supply, the latter mainly in the form of Gins & Tonics and Port.

Sipping the inaugural and inevitable G&T

After taking care of the necessary hydration, we were
getting serious & ready for the Athletics. This required
us to walk over to the Market Square. The weather was
not cooperating, so these Games were cut somewhat short.


1
The first event was to be Velocipede Polo, but due to bad
weather and lack of proper equipment, we settled for
Cricket instead. A proper Victorian Gentleman must be
able to set up a game of Cricky anywhere, anytime:

In the excitement we lost count of the wickets and points
and such, so no winner was declared.


2

Next event was something less familiar to us Gentlemen, as the
sport is of Far-Orient origins. Maj. Coastnail once brought a
chinese Shuttle-cock from his cruises, which implored us to
try our hand (or foot, to be more precise) in this challenging
second event. However, we decided to ante up the challenge
by continuing to drink our G&Ts while playing, yet not
allowing to spill any!

As this sport has, actually, no competitiviness, and is
in fact rather a pass-time of skill, cooperation and dexterity,
no winner was declared in this sport, either.

3

The last event was Duel. This, also, becomes very naturally to all British Gentlemen. Due to recent unpleasant events involving fire-arms in Finland, we decided to use water-balloons instead. The range and aim of balloons is radically different from guns, so a few rounds were "lost" to experimenting. For example, the 10 steps were reduced to 5, and then only 3, in order to keep the event more exciting and successful. Even so, only 2 or 3 hits were recorded, which proves that the Duel is quite difficult a sport!

No winner was declared in the Duel, either. It would, therefore, be rather proper to say, that all of us were winners at the Chap-athlon MMVIII! All had a good time, and the 'Thlon will very likely become an annual event. We will keep you posted for the MMIX Games with the Society Newsletter.

After the sports, we headed back to the Club, where many Important & Topical Matters were discussed in concerned yet constructive spirit, but as this is not the "Society for Historical Studies & Geo-Political Theories", there is no point in disclosing those discussions here...

The Society Staff wishes a very Merry Christmuchwanzaa to one and all!!

PS: Most of the photos in this Issue were by Dr. Jones, Esq, for whose services the Society thus expresses hearty thank-yous.

Welcoming our Antipodean delegation

Here are a couple of deguerrographs of the Helsinki contingent out at the Port of Helsinki to greet Dr. Wensworth, Esq, upon his arrival in the northern latitudes:

Illuminatory excess

DL&GotS,

a truly delightful light show was observed here at the Antipodean chapter yesterday. Splendid! Bravo! One does not exaggerate as one says that the flashes were more frequent than at a Celebratory Personage's divorce announcement address.

New Amsterdam Redux

Brooklyn Bridge, Empire State Building

Greetings, dear Readers!
This Autumn Yours Truly partook in a quick trip to New Amsterdam. An esteamed colleague from the Finnish Single Malt Society happens to work for the "Phinn-Aero" carrier, so through him we were able to get ourselves affordable tickets for the crossing. And through my connexions in N.A., we were able to lodge for free in the Brooklyn-Borough.

Our gracious host, Signore Forte, Esq. at his residence

I tried to meet a few of my old friends & colleagues, but also show the most important bits to Mr. von Lapp, Esq, along the way. We wondered the city far and wide, stopping for lunch with friends, and doing some (window)shopping along the way.

Vertical Downtown

Plenty of tall buildings to photograph

Two ladies from Europe, Ms. Essi & Ms. Tuula

A former colleague Ms. Ciao-Ping, with a random Mormon Missionary

The weather was nice, sunny the whole time, but chilly enough to make gloves almost a necessity. As it was getting near the All Hallow's Eve, some funny things were seen around town:

Bulls on Parade, Wall Street

Various Halloween necessities

Mr. von Lapp & a poster of the very funny comedienne Ms. Tina Fey

Naturally we visited some of my favourite commercial watering-holes & restaurants, while also, unfortunately, did not have enough time for some others...

The Burger Joint at Le Parker Meridien. The only thing missing was some Grey Poupon for the Hamburgers.

Mr. von Lapp & Ms. Keens, my favourite purveyor of quality Single Malt Whiskies

This time we only spent three whole days in the City, but it is most certainly worth another, more leisurely visit, later on. Thank you again for the host, friends and colleagues for a great time. Untill we meet again, don't know where, don't know when...!


Yours Truly etc,
Paddlewick, Esq. / Society New World Correspondent

For Your Consideration: Enzed

DL&GOTS

The esteemed Lady X once again demonstrated her extraordinary organisatory skills, smoothly amassing our assembly to the faraway country of Enzed. Furthermore, she, and good old PW, Esq, have made it painful not to submit the required report to the society archives.

Short and sweet does it, except if talking of port, of course.
The equippers of Backpackers stolidly explained the deepest secrets of their caravan, and after a couple of hours' lecture, we steered our ride toward Queenstown. Mr. McEwings outfitted us with trusty planques to plow the snow on, and off toward Arthur's Pass we sped...



...to find this. Whereas this Land of Eternal Cloud is well blessed with the adorable white fluff, its meaner skyborne ilk constantly patrol the peaks and valleys.



Except, of course, when they don't, and one suddenly remembers why burnt sclerae are such a bad idea. The local optiquearian gained a new customer, and rhum-and-cocoa were applied liberally to help YT forget the prickling misery.



The population of Enzed - quite friendly, as such, and both markedly more stressed and agreeable than their Ozzian enemies - apparently consists of

1. tourists and other ski-planqueures
2. secretive land-sculptors capable of turning the meanest mountainside into pastoral idyll
3. lamb, and occasionally elk
4. jovial, but territorial motör-cyclistae
5. rich and idle Da Vincian heli-copteuristas.

Having chauffeured Lady X around the isle, I continued my journey to some of the further reaches alone - always bearing in mind the hunt for snow, and for rhum-cocoa.



Anticipating the esteemed panel's question, yes, one has formulated a Staunch Opinion of the suitability of these southern Alps for the well versed gentlebeing. The views - when available - are uplifting and refreshing, jolly well. The snow - when available, and not swept away with wind or shrouded in fog - is quite excellent when fresh, but horrid and unhealthy frozen by spring thaw. The height of the mountlets is sufficient for brisk excercise, but not enough for sustained effort and snow conditions. Oddly enough, the cozy alpine lodge with its crackling fire, furred floors, hearty timbers redolent of coniferous sap, pitchers of port gently swaying in the currents of mirth and merriment - all this is lacking, as the silly sculptors-of-pastoralities have neglected to build said lodges on the appropriate slopes. Instead, one is instructed to descend to the sea level for night, and trudge back up first thing in the morning, quite before a gentleman should ever consider opening the weary eye. If then; the ultra-violent antipodean solar radiosity scrapes the eye harshly indeed.



Yes, regrettably; these mountlets are beautiful to behold and good to shred, but they can't hold a candle to those looming spines of the world where port-laden lodges hidden lie.